Sunday, July 16, 2006

The guilty list

I found an entry in blog called, Sprigs. The author has made a list about all the things that she is guilty about and it REALLY got me thinking. I am a woman of guilt. After reading the list in the Sprigs blog I couldn't believe how many of her guilts were similar to mine. I'm not going to spend time writing about all the things I feel guilty about (and there are a lot) but I want to think about why I, and I guess, women in general, feel so guilty about things. Things that really we shouldn't even feel guilty for.

For instance, when I began looking for a new job while working in family literacy and I got that new job, I felt a horrible sense of guilt when my co workers did not have jobs upon being laid off. Feeling empathetic is one thing, but I felt down right guilty. I shouldn't have. We all had the same information at the same time. We all knew that the program would most likely be closed. Yet, I was one of the few staff who decided to do something with that information. When I had a job lined up (one that I was VERY excited to start, mind you) and my co workers did not I felt aweful that I was going to be okay and they were very likely going to be spending the rest of the summer struggeling financially if they didn't find something soon.

So I ask all of you who feel guilty--why do you? What can you do to let go of so much guilt? And, if you don't feel guilty about things--how do you keep yourself from feeling guilty?


Ms. Mamma said...

Do you like her writing? I love that blog. Guilt, hmmm... someone made me feel guilty in a very indirect but direct way, sort of making me feel bad and making me feel like I had to un-do what I did, so I did but I didn't HAVE to. People are so strange... WTF?

Rachie-Babe said...

Yeah that is a great blog. . . . I just sort of stumbled upon it and I could really relate to the guilt thing.

The Wicker Man said...

I think guilt is such a mainstay of our lives because it was a tool used by so many religions over the centuries, that we've simply become used to the idea that we've done something wrong.

In retrospect, religions aren't the only bodies that use guilt as a weapon. Governments and the media use guilt to sway voters, readers, and viewers into changing or supporting the opinions of others.

In further retrospect (if there is such a thing), individuals use guilt every day as a way to either get what they want (materialistically-speaking) or advancing themselves in some way. How many times has a child came up to you and given you those puppy-dog eyes when they want something. One could argue that it's not guilt, but sympathy, but in a roundabout way, some people could actually feel GUILTY for allowing their child to not have what they want.

Human nature is self-destructing in so many ways that groups or bodies that use it usually get what they want because they already know that guilt is a driving force that not very many people in the mainstream of life can avoid.

As a little test of your own guilt detection abilities, what do you think of when you read the product line called "Weight Watchers"? What do you think a person who feel that they are overweight thinks of when they read the same thing?